I'll tell you how. Blame technology. I do. I have spent great deal of precious time this morning...time that I could have spent procrastinating about writing...battling with my printer. My printer is a LIAR. My printer kept on saying there was no paper in his tray when there WAS. Why would he do this to me? Don't I dust him and keep him plugged in and talk to him politely and thank him when he has performed well? (One out of four ain't bad)
It transpired that the settings were incorrect after I re-installed. It was set on 'Letter' instead of 'A4.' Why couldn't he have just SAID? Why couldn't he just have said, quite calmly, "I'm terribly sorry, Caroline, but my settings are incorrect and I am under the mistaken impression that there is the wrong sort of paper in my tray." Instead of making up all that garbage about "there's no paper in my tray."
WHY? Perhaps it's because he's an inanimate object with no sentient brain? A mere machine. Impossible. All my possessions have personalities and character traits. And names, very often.
And Peregrine Printer is a stubborn bastard with a communication problem.
And now it's lunch time.